Always take life into your own hands. Always take responsibility for your actions, and don’t blame others. Create an upward spiral of positivity and success and don’t succumb to the cesspool of negativity. Easier said than done? Not really, it all depends on you it’s all in your hands to change the circumstances you’re in right now.
- Economy is bad.
- My girlfriend dumped me.
- My kids don’t want to spend time with me because their mother brainwashes them to hate me.
Sounds familiar? And even more important, do you see a pattern?
- Can’t pay the bills = economy’s fault
- Girlfriend leaves? Her fault
- Kids don’t like me = ex’s fault
I’m unhappy, and it’s the world’s fault.
This defeating self-talk is something lots of people engage in on a daily basis, either consciously or unconsciously.
If you are aware of your bad self-talk then do this:
Talk to yourself in a mirror and bitch about everything that comes to mind, your short comings, why you are not rich, why you are unhappy, why bad shit is happening to you, why this and why that. At the end of it ask yourself the question What are you going to do about it?
Accountability and motivational groups are a wide spread phenomenon and huge in getting women and weak men to stick to their goals. They use social media competitions, comparisons, and gamification to get losers to pretend that they have self-discipline.
It might work for some people heck a good bunch of them might even reach their goals through that crap, but the price they paid for that is that they didn’t develop valuable traits, such as the ability to achieve goals by yourself through internal drive and discipline and not some external bullshit.
I’d rather struggle and get knocked down a few times, but persevere and develop the internal drive & discipline. That means more to me than using social feel good techniques, validation and group support as a crutch. Why? Because you will face all significant challenges in life ALONE.
When shit hits the fan, it’s always you who has to take responsibility for it. When you get fired, or you fail in a business endeavor, it’s you alone with your failure, and it’s you alone that has to pick up the pieces.
That’s why I train and improve myself alone, knowing it’s harder and slower, because when disasters inevitably strike that I have to face alone, I’m well equipped for them. Train and prepare yourself for those moments by doing things on your own and always taking full responsibility for your actions.
What about building your tribe?
Men have always kept an eye on each other: among family members, among social peers, among comrades and colleagues.
We are social beings that work best with like-minded people, so it makes sense to build or join a tribe.
A tribe, however, is only as strong as it’s the weakest link so make sure that you have a tribe of elitist people around you that are all on an equally skilled level, striving to improve day in and out. I always say that you should have four more people around you which make it a total of five people, no particular reason but I just found that five works best. Small enough, so it doesn’t turn into a mess and big enough to make things happen.
Losers rely upon other losers to hold them accountable and “support” each other by patting themselves on the back without getting anything done.
Winners work mostly alone since it’s lonely at the top. They have mentors and people they use for some tangible benefit, but they will never rely on other people as a source of external motivation, they rely on themselves.
You don’t need others to keep you accountable; how else will you ever learn the crucial skill of being accountable to yourself?
Break out of the group-thinking. If you seek advice, ask. If you need help, ask. But if you want someone to keep you responsible and take charge of your personal growth and development then you’ll be very disappointed.
Need more money? Pick up more hours. Hate your job? Find a new one.
Bitching about your life won’t get you anywhere. It’s your life; you own it. You don’t like something then change it.
As always thanks for reading and until next time.
P.S. Did you like what you read? Then I highly suggest to take a look at my book SHATTERED you can get it on Amazon.
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